Gratitude Day 326

Thurs., Sept. 19, 2019

Matthew 6:34: Therefore, do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.

I see the quote on the sign. And I want to make those words my words. I want to believe these words. I want to say, “Dianne, whatever you do today WILL be enough.”

But it only lasts about 30 seconds. My mind is racing. How will I ever accomplish all that is on the docket today?

Breath. Pray quickly. Breath.

Maybe another cup of coffee will make things all better.

Right?

Wrong.

The docket list sits just around the corner, along with stacks of papers and jobs and responsibilities behind my desk.

Whatever you do today will be enough.

Oh, I so want to believe this. But feel failure is lurking along the fringes of today. Waiting for me to fail. Knowing that at the end of the day, there’s a good possibility that I will feel disappointed. In myself.

Almost two years ago, I began a journey. An experiment. Could this dyed-in-the-wool Martha busy body find a bit more Maryness in her life? She’s the sister who chose not to do but opted to sit at Jesus’ feel and be with him. After decades of doing, doing and doing … could I slow down to the posted speed limit and allow myself to sit at Jesus’ feet and learn from the teacher?

There have been brief moments of breakthrough, followed by days of overdoing and overcommitting. Every time I feel that I’ve made a tiny step forward, my contentment of “having things under control” washes down the drain.

Anyone else feel my struggle? Question their enough? Long for a life that feels more manageable?

Generally, I do not think of myself as a person who worries. There is one exception. Will I accomplish enough today? Will I get the “right” things done?

Will today be enough?

Breathe. Pray, even if quickly. Let the Spirit wash over you and quiet your soul.

Let whatever you do today be enough.

For a place to share my struggles, I am grateful. 

Holy God – come to me. Come to my sister or brother who is struggling today. May we know that we are enough. Our today is enough. Amen.

Blessings –

Dianne

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