Fri., Jan. 11, 2019
Psalm 90:14 – Fill us full every morning with your faithful love so we can rejoice and celebrate our whole life long.
Today is a big day in our household. One of us turns a significant age; one that begins with a 6 and ends with a 5.
This would be the person I lovingly refer to as Hubby Rick.
Would you humor me as I take a quick spin down memory lane? And share why this guy means so much to me?
Thanks for humoring me.
Rick and I met in the most unusual of places: while I was interviewing for my first church appointment as a pastor. I was meeting with the leadership from the two potential churches I would be serving. At the time, Rick was the Ad Council chair for one of the churches. Also present at the meeting? My future in-laws.
Dating for a pastor is a little more complicated than “normal” dating. Dating someone from a congregation that you are serving is emphatically not suggested. It’s like dating your boss. When it became clear that we wanted to consider dating, Rick and I jumped through many, many hoops to do things we felt were the “right” way. Seriously, most of the recommendations would have been enough to send any guy packing. But then again, Rick wasn’t just any guy.
From the get-go, we knew that we didn’t have to get married. We chose to be married. There is a HUGE difference, folks. With this as the basis of our relationship, the option of not being married to each other is off limits. We choose to challenge ourselves to add value and joy to each other’s lives. In choosing to do this thing called marriage, this would be something we would do until one of us wasn’t here on earth. Period.
To say that Rick has brought significant joy to my life would be an understatement. While dating, we both did a Myers-Briggs personality test. In all four areas, we were exact opposites. I am peanut butter and he is jelly. I am ying and he is my yang. I am trying to save the world and he’s just trying to keep up. Being opposites means we rarely have boring days. We just have to learn to navigate from completely different points of view.
Yet, we have made it work. Over time, we have modified and adopted a bit more of each other’s personalities. Most days, he still surprises me with a response or reaction I could not anticipate. I know there have been way too many times I have made fun of him, our difference in age and taken advantage of him in my writings and messages. He has graciously accepted this role, more so than I would have. In the process, he teaches the teacher another valuable lesson.
While I have always felt supported and encouraged to follow my dreams, Rick’s commitment to me the past 13 months has made me love and appreciate him even more. When I shared with him that I wanted to step back from pastoral ministry and pursue other things I felt God calling me towards, he didn’t hesitate. He didn’t flinch. He only encouraged me to follow the leadings of my heart and chase whatever God has in front of me. He didn’t question how this would affect us financially or bemoan that this decision might mean he would delay retirement longer. He gladly accepted his role to support my ministry, in whatever form that looks like, and encourages me to continue this path.
I have a self-aware husband who knows his faults. There are days when life bogs us down and we struggle. But I never question his commitment to me, our marriage and most importantly, faith in God.
What made Rick different from all those other guys? His faith in God and his commitment to my calling and ministry. It’s not easy to live with a person who believes following God’s call in their life precedes everything else. He believes that his call in life is to follow my call. While this may appear to some that he is playing second fiddle, he has the grace to see it quite differently. When we commit to our faith first, the rest falls into place.
There are so many qualities and traits that I admire about this man. But his faith in God is always at the top of the list. It’s what has kept him grounded for most of his 65 years. I know this will be what keeps him going for every day forward.
For the presence of a Godly and faith-filled man in my life, I am grateful.
Lord God – when you lay out our life’s plans, I believe you give us many choices. Thanks for bringing into my life a man who strives to be a servant disciple. May you bless him on this special day. Amen.
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