Ephesians 4:32 – Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.

Gratitude Day 842

I caught myself being not very kind to someone on the phone recently.

And as I was saying those things that I knew were not kind, I was more than a little disgruntled with myself.

We are owed a refund from a company. I called in January requesting the refund. Now, six months later, the refund has not been issued. I received an email again showing that we are owed the refund. So, I picked up the phone and called the company.

I wasn’t super kind.

I wasn’t patient.

I was short and persnickety and basically, very rude, to the person on the other end of the phone.

And I was embarrassed when I got off the phone.

I sure hope the people on the other end did not take it personally. I have no idea what was going on in their lives. I could only imagine they going home and saying to a loved one, “Boy, did I get a difficult person at my job today. She was kind of a witch.”

Yep, that would have been me.

It wasn’t this the people that I talked with that held up the refund. I don’t know who it was. What I do know is that I should have been more kind to them.

Do you ever catch yourself turning into a person what you makes you wonder, “Who is THAT person?” And you realize it was YOU.

Unfortunately, we think that the best way to get results is to be difficult. Rude. Unkind. Yet, I can think of many different times when I was those things to someone else and Wow! I got what I wanted without even asking.

Hmmm. Maybe it is easier to catch flies with honey than with vinegar.

Unfortunately, this isn’t an isolated incident. Yes, I really try to be kind most days. But there is every-so-often the random day that I am a hot minute where I just do not show kindness.

What do I wish I would have done differently on that day I was not very kind on the phone? Here’s a few ideas.

Decided in advance that I WAS going to be kind. Period. When you decide this

 in advance, you have already made a decision about how you are going to react.

Take a deep breath when someone has a completely different response than you anticipate. Or count to 10 in your head really quickly before you talk.

Smile before you talk. It is difficult to be angry when you are smiling.

Listen. Just listen. Sometimes fewer words are better.

Ask the person, “What do you suggest?” Maybe they do have a better idea than you do.

Try to imagine how you would feel if the difficult “you” was speaking to you. How would you feel? React?

If you find yourself becoming defensive or difficult, decide for yourself that it might be better to deal with this when you are in a different place mentally. Sometimes, it is worth the time to deal with it later when your head is in a better space.

Finally remember that you do not know what the person is going through right now. Maybe they are having a bad day. A difficult day. Something that is challenging them in their lives. And they just need someone to be kind to them. You have the chance to be that person. Will you accept this opportunity?

Most often, I do believe that people are difficult or challenging with others when they have something going on in their life. Hurt people tend to hurt other people. So, when someone is being difficult with you, maybe the most helpful thing you can do is ask them one question: “What is going on in your life right now?”

You might be surprised their response. Maybe this will open the door for someone to share something personally with you that really is heavy on their heart. Too often, we are begging for someone to show just a bit of interest in our lives. When the door is opened, you might be surprised what comes gushing out. And when this does happen, being kind is super important. Making ourselves vulnerable and sharing personal things is difficult. When someone does this with you, then respect this and be kind.

Being kind is one of the simplest things we can do. It costs us nothing. Is free to extend. Should be something that becomes second-nature for us.

Who can YOU be kind to this weekend? Next week? Today? Everyday?

For the opportunity to be kind to others, I am very grateful.

Blessings –

Dianne

Holy God – Thanks for being so kind to us always. Now, inspire me to be kind to those around me. People I love. People I don’t know. People who I want to assist me. Inspire me to be kind to those around me. Amen.

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