The Vulnerability Line

Gratitude Day 518

Fri., Oct. 1, 2020

James 1:2-3 – My fellow believers, when it seems as though you are facing nothing, but difficulties see it as an invaluable opportunity to experience the greatest joy that you can! For you know that when your faith is tested it stirs up power within you to endure all things.

There’s a line that can be easily crossed: when is too much information too much? And when is not enough information not enough?

It’s really a very personal question. Some people believe its case-by-case and person-by-person.

There are some people who leave little to the imagination. They tell you seemingly EVERYTHING whether you want to hear it or not. Hubby Rick often says, “Who needs all those details? I can tell the same story as you with one-quarter of the words.”

Yes, he would say that too often, I’m one of those people who share too much.

Contrast this with the person who requires significant wrangling to get any information out of. Details are NOT their friend and therefore, there is little need for them to be shared with anyone else.

I’m confident that either end of the vulnerability spectrum is not always the best. We can easily get bogged down in way too many details. But then again, there are often important details that never see the light of day.

And there’s a big, huge gap in-between the two ends of the spectrum. The land where some detail is good. More detail is helpful. Being able to not overreact or dramatize a situation is prudent. It’s the land of just the right amount of vulnerability.

The problem? Most of us are never quite sure where the line between too much, not enough and just the right amount of info should lie. We want to share helpful information but don’t want to bore folks with endless gossip and more of our own opinions than actual facts.

Yes, the actual topic has a huge influence on where that line gets drawn as well. Normal, run-of-the-mill stuff is not the same as the challenges and disappointments we all experience. Some things are simply too hard to share. We don’t want all of our dirty laundry aired for everyone to hear and see.

Yet, sometimes, it’s so helpful to know that maybe there’s someone else who has experienced or gone through a similar experience. Their wisdom and guidance can be invaluable.

If we’re willing to share. Make ourselves vulnerable. Crack open that land that we often don’t want anyone else to take a peek into.

Within families, couples, friend groups, some people simply maybe more vulnerable than others. We know who they are and love them. Then, there are those friends that when they do speak up, everyone else better listen. Closely. It maybe another decade before it happens again.

I watch some people who share ridiculous amounts of seemingly “private” information on social media. And others, simply read everyone else’s information and never post anything themselves. Neither is right. Neither is wrong. It just is.

When is too much too much? When are we too guarded and carry the burden of something ourselves and don’t allow anyone else to journey with us through a challenging time?

It’s not easy to know where that line is.

What I do pray … is that we always remember, with God, there simply is no line. Yes, God already knows what is going on. Is aware of our feelings and struggles and challenges. Yet, God wants to hear those insights and feelings and emotions directly from us. In our own words. God wants us to break open our hearts and souls and let vulnerability gush over every living thing in our life with God.

Why? Because when we share it with God, we no longer carry the burden ourselves.

Bad things are going to happen to us. It’s just going to happen. And when those things happen, we’ll decide how much and with whom we share the situation, our feelings and how we’re dealing with it. The line will be ours to choose.

What I do pray is that we don’t hold any of this back from God. Whether we tell everyone or no one, there is SOMEONE with whom our situation is safe. And that is God.

I pray we are absolutely as raw and vulnerable with God as we can be. That’s how God wants it.

For God’s deep desire to know every detail and challenge in our lives, I am grateful.

Blessings –

Dianne

Holy God – we often struggle with knowing where the appropriate sharing line should be. Well, some of us do. Others seemingly share EVERYTHING while we also know those people who seemingly share NOTHING. I pray that with You, we allow ourselves to be deeply vulnerable and open. May we remember that with You, there is no judgement. Expectation. Only grace. Amen.

If you have enjoyed this blog, please pass it along to someone else who will also enjoy it.